By Alicia of alburnet.wordpress.com
It took me twenty three years to come to terms with the kinks in my own hair. Two years after that, I loc’d it up. Loose natural hair (loose hair of any type) stymied me. I’d been chided my entire salon-going life for being too lazy about hair care. Locs were the perfect solution. They were patient, they were kind, and most of all, they grew best when I left them alone.
All was well in the world of hair.
But then she came into my life. Bald, pink, wrinkled, and completely adorable.
“I thought she’d be browner, ” my young cousin said.
“I thought she’d have curls like yours, ” my MIL lamented.
“I thought she’d look at least a tiny bit like me, ” I said.
Given time – all of our expectations were met. By her first birthday, three curls had appeared – one one top and one on either side. By her second birthday, she had a fluffy halo of shiny brown curls.
“You need to do something to it, ” my older cousin said.
“You need to get it trimmed, so it’ll grow, ” my mother said.
“At least she has ‘good’ quality hair, ” my step-mother said. After everyone yelled at her and took the proper amount of umbrage, she amended her statement. “I mean, at least it’ll be easier to manage.”
She had criticized my mother for relaxing and straightening my own hair when I was very young, but after spending twelve years on my sister’s unruly tresses, she was willing to give straightening a few thoughts. (Just heat and and a little product, mind you. Still no “chemicals”.)
But her hair isn’t easy to manage – no more than my own kinky cloud was at her age. It’s just different. My hair, now loc’d, was thick and woolly. Her father’s hair, stick straight. But Petals? Her hair is fine, slick, shiny, and oh-so-curly. But by the afternoon it’s dry, tangled, and, the top at least, is completely frizzed. She has corkscrews in the back, and a cloud on the top. Oh, and it traps things – glitter, lint, bugs. Mostly glitter.
And we have so many questions.
- How often should we wash it?
- What do we wash it with?
- How do I moisturize it? (Do I need to moisturize it?)
- How do I style it?
- How do I trim it?
- What kind of hair utensils should we use?
So, the experimenting began. Poor child. Poor, poor child. So far, this is what we’ve found. When it’s dirty, we wash it. Simple enough. My hair moisturizing products (I say “products” like they’re cool. It’s only olive oil… and maybe some watered down Twist & Lock cream. I used to be a product junkie. I’m reformed.) DO NOT work on her hair. Her curls get weighted down and greasy. Quite frankly, the result was a mess. Jane Carter Solution “leave-in conditioner” for a light “daily” moisturizing DOES seem to work, however. We spray it with water and brush it when it’s wet, then use some of the leave-in to de-tangle and comb at night. Flat twists or a tiny braid work to keep it from tangling up over night. And I can twirl it around my finger to separate the curls during the day. Pig-tails or a “head bang” (fabric head band) work best to keep her hair out of her face (and out of the school’s glitter supply) when she’s out.
And it’s growing. A ton. Down to her shoulder-blades when wet, and around her chin when dry…so that must be a good sign, right? I’m sure that I’ll keep researching and reaching out to other curly-heads. Other than that… well…it’s a work in progress.
